Why My Son Makes Me Want To Be Better

  Yes, I have 2 daughters.  I don't love them any less than my son.  I don't want less for them.  And until my son I thought I was doing the best I could for them.  But they aren't boys.  They won't marry a woman.  And that is what made me realize I want to be better.
  I heard it said that boys marry women like their mothers and girls marry men like their fathers.  That made me think, am I the kind of woman I'd want my son to spend his life with?  It was a hard reality, because I'm not.  So now I will try harder to be better.  It took having a son to see their is a better version of myself I want to strive for.  There was nothing wrong with before, but now I've raised my standards.  That means this:
-Making a choice to get dressed (and showered) everyday
-Welcome my husband home happily instead of dumping my problems on him
-Choosing to let them see me be goofy (nothing will help the years pass like laughter)
-Putting my husband's needs first
-Exercising and eating healthier

  These things may seem vain or unimportant to some, but to me they are things I want my son to look for in a woman.  Not that I'm looking for outer beauty.  Getting dressed, showering, exercising and eating better makes me feel better about myself.  And when I feel better, I am happy.  Sadness is natural, and my kids will see me cry.  But self-pity is destructive.  I don't want that to be a trait my children think is normal.  My goofy I tend to hide out of fear they may not see me as an authority.  Why, I don't know.  But I've realized that authority will not change by me being myself with them.  Putting my husband first...I know not every one agrees your children should come last. I know, biblical, what is said and how much sense it makes to me for the order to be God, husband, children.  I get that, but don't always model that.  I need to.  Not just for my son either.
  Has having children changed the way you see yourself or your actions?

Part 3: My Mental Preparation For a C-Section

  At my 36 week appointment my ob set my surgery for just a mere 8 days later.  I had no birth plan (gasp!).  I have 2 other kids at home and my nerves were already on edge about this new experience that was quickly approaching.  I couldn't think straight long enough to create on.  I knew in my head what I'd accept and what I was willing to put my foot down on.

  Other than having trouble getting the bleeding to stop, my surgery went well.  I had a beautiful 7 lb. 6 oz. healthy baby boy 3 weeks early.  I took the pain medicine as instructed.  After a year and a half of NO synthetic medication that sent my body all out of whack (more on that later).  But I had no back-lash or fight over my refusal to vaccinate,  I didn't even need to give them my informed refusal form.  And they didn't make me sign any weird paper.  I was very grateful for that.  I didn't need a plan, they allowed me to do as I felt best.  When I asked to give my new baby a bottle because my milk still hadn't set in, no comments were made.  I was allowed to keep a paper that tracked everything so they didn't have to come in as often.  Aside from the c-section recovery being so much harder than my vaginal births, it went very smooth.  

  I think this experience was God's way of reminding me I can't control it all.  Before finding out vaginal birth wasn't an option I was dead-set on having things a certain way.  And I would get mean if anyone said anything about being willing to give a little.  I wouldn't hear of it.  But I wouldn't trade this experience.  I have a new-found respect for c-section mammas.  I honestly don't think I would have had multiple children if I had a c-section first.  That was so much harder recovery wise than my other two births were, in my opinion, but every one is different.  So, just learn that not everything can be perfect, and not every one is out to ruin our experience.  All that matters in the end is that you have a healthy outcome and beautiful baby no matter how that happens, just as long as it does happen.

Acetaminophen Dependency

  Never thought I would reach a point where my body would become dependent on acetaminophen, but it has.  I have been taking it every day for 2 months.  I didn't think there was anything wrong with that.  I had a c-section, and now I deal with a horrible toothache.  I've started grinding my teeth at night that only adds to my toothache.  Yes, I should just go to the dentist.  But...I have 3 kids, no sitter, and the closest in network dentist is 30 miles away.  Not an option right this moment.

  I am not taking much a day.  Not even a full pill.  But I realized there was a problem when I tried not to take it and consistently got horrible headaches on those days.  Sadly, all I'd initially found to counteract this was ibuprofen, which I can not take while breast-feeding.  I finally had a breaking point today that made me realize I need to do something and I need to do it now.  I started to feel a panic attack set in at the thought of taking away those pills.  That is when I realized I need to detox my body from this and do it now.
  So here is what I found.  Large intakes of Vitamin C will counteract what the acetaminophen does in the liver.  Rose hip has the highest amount of Vitamin C according to what I found researching.  So tomorrow I plan to find a rose hip tea of some sort.   I will post more on how I feel after about a week.